I wander upstairs. There are a lot of spare desks. "It's empty!" I say loudly to the only two people in the room. "That means you get your pick of desks," comes R's reply. I decide to sit opposite R. Big mistake. He is clearly incapable of being quiet. At all. Either by talking to himself or to you; or singing a completely random song that may or may not have something to do with a comment he has made in the last minute. As a result I get nothing done in the forty five minutes I am sitting up there. Somehow the conversation turns to accents. I explain, as I have done about five times since I moved back down here, that my accent is screwed up. Five minutes later the talk has turned to time machines [it got there because R started singing, "if I could turn back time"...] "I wish I had a time machine" I say out loud. "Do you? What would you do with it?" asks R. There is a pause and before I can reply R adds, "go back in time and get rid of that accent?"

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